But it’s more than just the language. Add to this a different city, with different drivers, different roads, and different everything, and you get a headache just trying to explain that you need to make sure the driver is really stopping before you start crossing the street. In my home country, I used to know when to trust that cars and drivers would stop at crosswalks. Here, I find myself scanning the street nervously, aware of how local habits differ. I am constantly balancing the need to teach my kids confidence with the reality of our new surroundings.

And it’s not just about crossing the street. Think about all the little routines that make up your day-to-day parenting—the meals, the bedtime rituals, the playdates. Everything feels different abroad. I remember the first time I tried to set up a playdate for my daughter here in France. Back home, it was as simple as texting another mom, and voila, plans were made. But here, there are unspoken cultural rules about when and how to arrange these things, and I found myself second-guessing everything. Should I invite the mom in for coffee when she picks up her child? Do I send a thank-you message afterward?

These questions might sound small, but when you’re in a foreign country, they add up quickly. Suddenly, I found myself worrying about whether my daughter would be seen as impolite or if I was inadvertently stepping on social norms I didn’t even know existed. Every aspect of life, even the small, seemingly insignificant details, can feel overwhelming when you're navigating them in a new cultural context.

When my daughter cries out of frustration because she can’t find the right words in her new language, it breaks my heart a little. I see her struggling to express herself, to fit in, and I know she’s facing a unique set of challenges that I never had to as a child. I want to protect her from these difficulties, but I also know I need to let her experience them so she can grow and learn. It’s a delicate balance, and I often find myself questioning whether I’m doing the right thing.

Let’s not forget our own well-being as mothers. The amount of stress we have, trying to do everything just to make sure the kids feel comfortable, adapted, and secure, while also juggling life in a foreign country and the day-to-day normal mom life—is just a lot.
These questions might sound small, but when you’re in a foreign country, they add up quickly. Suddenly, I found myself worrying about whether my daughter would be seen as impolite or if I was inadvertently stepping on social norms I didn’t even know existed. Every aspect of life, even the small, seemingly insignificant details, can feel overwhelming when you're navigating them in a new cultural context.

The pressure we put on ourselves is so big that sometimes a normal moment with your kids can quickly escalate to an "I-need-a-moment-to-myself-please-don’t-come-close-unless-you-have-wine" situation. And that’s okay. Sometimes, I feel like I’m carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. There’s this unspoken expectation that we should be thriving in our new life abroad, not just surviving. But the reality is, there are days when I’m barely holding it together.